Mom's out there how old would a child have to be?

mackenzie · by **mackenzie** » Sat Mar 17, 2022 6:00 pm

Hey girls,
I am curious here, last weekend I was working (and I was working night duty) so oh's friend asks him does he want to go out, now he had said no earlier in the day to him as he had his son for the weekend. Anyway he had a chat to his son and he decided that he would go out for a few drinks, it was 930ish and he would be back for 12. So he leaves his son all alone in the house as it was too late to get a babysitter. Now his son is barely 13, and I think this is way too young to leave the child all alone in the house. So we argued over it, he thinks I'm being very unreasonable I think I'm being sensible?
any input greatly appreciated, Is it just me?
He says we need to start trusting him etc etc and I'm like No he is too young
?
thanks in advance

by **newbaby2010** » Sat Mar 17, 2022 6:46 pm

mackenzie wrote:Hey girls,
I am curious here, last weekend I was working (and I was working night duty) so oh's friend asks him does he want to go out, now he had said no earlier in the day to him as he had his son for the weekend. Anyway he had a chat to his son and he decided that he would go out for a few drinks, it was 930ish and he would be back for 12. So he leaves his son all alone in the house as it was too late to get a babysitter. Now his son is barely 13, and I think this is way too young to leave the child all alone in the house. So we argued over it, he thinks I'm being very unreasonable I think I'm being sensible?
any input greatly appreciated, Is it just me?
He says we need to start trusting him etc etc and I'm like No he is too young
?
thanks in advance

It depends on a number of factors, but the short answer is no,in my opinion, he shouldnt be left like that.
I have a 15 year old and wouldnt have left him when he was barely 13 till midnight.
HTH and good luck

chicabride · by **chicabride** » Sat Mar 17, 2022 8:32 pm

I have a 14 year old and while I would leave him for a few hours during the day..I wouldnt leave him at night so I could go out for a drink(or food or cinema etc)...Thats my personal opinion though...

nini83 · by **nini83** » Sat Mar 17, 2022 9:37 pm

Hard to call - does sound a little bit young to me though

Momster · by **Momster** » Sat Mar 17, 2022 10:07 pm

13s too young i think... they are still a child at this stage..

elpi · by **elpi** » Sun Mar 18, 2022 12:07 am

My stepson is 13 and he comes home after school to an empty house for 1-2 hours. However no way would we leave him home alone for a few hours at night time while we went out. Just consider him too young. Maybe in another year or so but not yet.

boodlesdoodles · by **boodlesdoodles** » Sun Mar 18, 2022 12:45 am

By law i think the youngest a child can be left on their own is 14, but that could be a UK law, not sure.

My DD is 14 and just this year we have left her on her own twice while we went out for a drink. Bearing in mind im pregnant, so wasnt drinking, i was a a 3min drive away the first time, and literally in a small hotel across the road from our house second time, so she could ring me at any stage and i would have been there within minutes. My mums house is also just down the road. We were home by 12 each time, so barely 3hrs on her own.
I think girls are more sensible though than boys, and i know my sister still wont leave her 15yr son alone, cos she doesnt trust him not to burn the house down!

We have to give them responsibility at some stage, they need to learn, and i dont feel 14 is too young, or even 13 for some kids.
We were left alone at that age, sometimes minding younger siblings too, and we managed not to die or kill one of the others.

Dd has a strict set of rules she must stick to, the door stays locked, she doesnt open it unless the house is on fire! Shes not allowed use the gas hob, only the microwave or elec oven.., but she uses those when im with her, so she is well capable.
I have no problem leaving her, and she is very sensible, and just sits watching tv or playing video games. She loves it cos we have to bring her home chipper food( our parents did the same for us) :o0

I think it depends on the child and you really, you know best if you think they are responsible enough to be left alone for a few hours.

At 14 i was going to the local nightclub(over 18's), smoking and drinking, so being left alone was not a huge deal in comparison. At least if i was home alone, i was actually at home!! DD on the otherhand is a saint compared to me, im waiting for the rebellion to kick in any day now.

SandyClaws · by **SandyClaws** » Sun Mar 18, 2022 1:03 am

Think it depends on the child, like I would have been able to be left alone at that age but my sister wouldn't have been. She'd have invited all her friends in to watch telly or something whereas I'd have done exactly what I was told to do

micls · by **micls** » Mon Mar 19, 2022 8:47 am

I was babysitting my little sister and that age. I was also babysitting other people's kids!

I was a mature teenager though. I guess it depends on the kid.

jen09 · by **jen09** » Mon Mar 19, 2022 9:13 am

I think it depends on the child.

I was left at the age of 10 to mind my brother (7) and sister (3); I was very responsible but IMO I feel that was too young & I was made grow up way too fast.

OH's niece is almost 17 & not allowed stay at home on her own as she's very irresponsible & would burn the house down just thinking about turning on the oven!

CarolinaMoon · by **CarolinaMoon** » Mon Mar 19, 2022 2:29 pm

My brother and I were left alone together at 9/10 on a saturday night. There were never any problems but it really depends on the child.

Cupcake666 · by **Cupcake666** » Tue Mar 20, 2022 7:21 pm

I was babysitting my sibling at 12 but i was mature enough to know if at any point i was afraid or didn't know what to do i could call my mother who was literally 5mins away! in saying that i would definitely not leave my own child at 12, maby 15 would be the youngest for me to leave my children alone and even at that it would only be for an hour or two.

ninja next · by **ninja next** » Tue Mar 20, 2022 8:52 pm

micls wrote:I was babysitting my little sister and that age. I was also babysitting other people's kids!

I was a mature teenager though. I guess it depends on the kid.

Plus one on this! Totally depends on the kid though

mackenzie · by **mackenzie** » Tue Mar 20, 2022 8:57 pm

thanks everyone for your replies, I showed oh so at least he doesn't think it is only me!!

Rachel Fox Photography · by **Rachel Fox Photography** » Wed Mar 21, 2022 9:03 pm

It really depends on the child to be honest. I remember babysitting for neighbours at 12 but my middle brother was 16 before he babysat. I had a sister 2 years older yet I was asked to babysit more often as it was more in my nature I suppose. Then on the other hand I have a 14 year old brother who babysits for us all and is well able, having been an uncle from 4.

As far as I know there isnt a strict age in law here, common sense is a huge factor. Whereas years ago we would have been left at 9 or 10 I guess people are a little more strict now.

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